Dealing with Chronic Pain & Lifes Curve Balls

Unlike having cancer or being hurt in any type of accident, most people do not understand chronic pain and the effects it can have on the body , mind and spirit, and for those that think they know,including doctors, family , friends many are actually misinformed.So in the spirit of informing those who wish to try and understand: These are the things that I would like you to understand about me before you judge me or anyone else that tells you they live with chronic pain.

When you’ve got the flu you probably feel aweful, body aches, muscles hurt and when you break a bone the constant deep ache you feel and pain you feel that just dont want to let up sucks ….until its healed and then ta da your all better

People with chronic pain dont really get the ta da your now all better I’ve had pain for years,its been mild moderate severe ya just never know, its tiring frustrating and its not always unbearable but some days it can be.

I hate to be miserable its a real joy killer not just my joy but others around me as well. So everday, I work hard at not being miserable if I am in pain that day.

So, if you’re talking to me and I sound happy, it means I’m happy. That’s all.
It doesn’t mean that I’m painfree or not extremely tired, or that I’m all better, or any of those things.

Please don’t say, “Oh, you’re sounding better!” or “But you dont look sick” Or “Your looking so healthy!” Or get pissed off at me because my tone gives you the wrong idea…..

I like so many others with chronic pain are coping.
Please understand that “getting out and doing things” often makes me feel better because I am out and living but then later on if I have done to much I can feel pretty crappy.

Many don’t know what I go through some days or how I choose deal with my pain in my own private time. I personally dont like to broadcast Hey I feel like shit today stay your distance.

I need to exercise so I can prevent from becoming so stiff and honestly some days i just want to remain on the sofa. But I will exercise somewhat everyday. I have learned that 30 minutes a day doesnt have to all come at one time to be helpful. Break it up 3x 10 or 2x 15. Have to keep the  circulation  moving

Im sorry if I seem touchy,short or angry somedays it’s probably because I am. Its the pain talking or the stiffness from the change in weather that has me feeling like a 2×4 piece of wood. It’s not how I try to be. As a matter of fact, I try very hard to be my normal self you know the way I was before all this pain set in.. I hope you will try to understand. I have been, and am still, going through a lot. Chronic pain is hard for you to understand unless you have had it. It wreaks havoc on the body and the mind. It is exhausting somedays.

Now I wont lie my pain has gotten better but everyday I always have a little pain and then days I gave moderate pain. 

After all I am dealing with Osteoarthritis, Osteonecrosis, Spondylolthesis in L5b S1. It would be great if they all would give me a break for a while and I could be pain free. I can’t even remember  what totally pain free feels like. I know less pain is fabulous 

I changed many things                                  My diet to raw and cooked veggies and about 80 percent plant based, and  adding lots of herbs  and supplements help  and I drink Golden Milk a few times a week .
I have learned ways to help my pain…..until life throws yet another curve ball your way. Then you stop and wonder why… why something else….dont I have enough?

I know I will trust in the Lord to help through yet another something…..and be gratful the Lord is always with me….

Now  my December something ….was my husband having a heart attack and stent surgery on top of that dealing with all the walking  in the hospital and having to be strong for someone else, again.Its exhausting.
I am now taking out the trash carrying all the groceries in in multiple trips ,making sure your ok.
Some days I am just tired of being the strong one. But what choice do I have?

So as others need my help I go on put my pain on the back burner until I have a moment of peace to just cry or all myself to be exhausted. 

I try to protect my bones and lift differently and I ended up with
an unbilical hernia. Just diagnosed a couple months ago…….Great another something… happy January something 

I mean wow something else to add to this crazy life… so check this out I schedule surgery to fix hernia for March 9 2017 just need to go get an ekg and all set..another something ..February something…….But then I know I will trust in the Lord to help through yet another something…..and be gratful the Lord is always with me….

So I do an ekg comes back with some shit poor r wave progression.
So I was asked Mrs Andio when was your heart attack

Im like what ? Never!! Ok Now Im scared…  this something is scary 

What do I do?  I ask the usual why me questions and just pray 

I know I will trust in the Lord to help through yet another something…..and be gratful the Lord is always with me….
So I was then told we cant clear you for surgery until you see a Cardiologist

Oh God can I scream now !!

Its like never ending bullshit 
So now I am scared
Those once a day cigarettes I was having done
No more

So I am worried for days until I see a Cardiologist my anxiety is high and fear of heart disease has me very afraid 

Thank God when I did see the Cardiologist he was cool and very kind
They did do another ekg and said things looked pretty good….but that kinda confuses me.  But I’m not going to question a good ekg.  We talked about a nuclear stress test and I’m in. 
Because  my family history
Dad died at age 56
Mom died at age 65
both with cardiovascular issues

I agreed

So I go tomorrow ……..my March something  , it would be great to have a great something!! Like you won the lotto something or you got a lot of blog sponsors something 

Im nervous yet glad and hopeful I pass. I sure hope the stress test doesn’t kill me. 

I am choosing to walk/ jog vs getting injected with a medication that will speed up my heart for me. That would freak me out.  And told this test will last about 3-4 hours. Having treadmill and then pictures etc…..

So I’m praying my bones and back all hang in there. 

I can visualize the lady on the tread mill hold the wine and falling flat on her face …

But I wont be having wine… I get a nuclear injection
This will monotor my blood flow at rest and on exertion
the test will also provide images…

Soo wish me luck ….

One thing about pain is when your faced with other pressing health issues , you realize the pain in bones suck but at least Im alive. So I will keep pressing on battling pain and for now praying my heart is ok. I’m choosing to have faith in my bones. And  I’m putting all pain out of my brain. 

No matter what you have pain, chronic pain, illness what ever
learn to be grateful for everyday we have here on this amazing great planet.

To read about how I help control my pain scroll around my blog
Have a great Painfree or Less Painful Day ……..

Here is my song of the day Need You Now by Plumb  Need You Now

I know I will trust in the Lord to help through yet another something…..and be gratful the Lord is always with me….

 

 

#Osteoarthritis

#Osteonecrosis

#Spondylolithesis

#Spoonie

#ChronicPain

#Life

#Grateful

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2 thoughts on “Dealing with Chronic Pain & Lifes Curve Balls

Add yours

  1. Wow, I know how you feel. A little over 10 years ago I herniated my l4,l5and s1 and chipped vertabrae. They constantly reherniate and progress to arthritis in facet joints, etc.

    All I can say right now is that I went through the “why me” and still ask that of God. However, I do know that God did something with me, He made me an inspirational writer. In fact, I published a fitness book even with the back injury along with 6 others. The inspirational books have healed a paralyzed man by empowering his spirit. He is back to bodybuilding. He called me from London to tell me thank you for being obedient to God. Because of you I am living. We were both in tears. I had other testimonies with people eliminating their meds, etc.

    However, I still have chronic pain and ask God why? Didn’t I already write the healing books? No answer but He continues to save me from accidents where I surely would have been dead. It’s a long story and I have begun a novel and others but pause because sitting for 2hrs begins to bother me and the cycle of meds continues.

    I know He wanted me back here as I had deleted my previous blog and this is fairly new.

    No, it’s not a pitch to get you to buy my books even if I am now pushing their sales. I even created a gofundme account as I really didn’t do any of that but rather gave and gave of myself until I had to stop and focus on loving myself more instead of trying to save the World 8hrs a day for free…probono lifecoaching, nissionary work and more. No regrets, God wanted me to do this through my pain.

    You don’t know how bad I want to hug you and somehow tell you that God is going to use your pain to do something for Him that saves the broken.

    May God continue to direct your path and remove the pain because we were promised in John 10:10, that we are to live an abundant life in every area of our life.

    Much Love, Light and Blessings, Emma xoxoxo

    Like

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